Monday, September 15, 2008

I have a history of taking off my shirt

For almost the past twelve years, give or take a month, I have been pregnant, nursing or both.
It all started when I saw two lines on a cheap pregnancy test exactly three weeks after my honeymoon. It's true--we did more than ride around a bus with old people on Europe during those three weeks.

And almost ten months later when Miley was born, I nursed and I nursed more. I never even got my period back and then I was once again staring at two lines. And then a little over nine months later, Sarah was born and she nursed and she nursed. And surprise, I had, when she was 27 months old, a period. I felt a tad normal again and then less than a month later, two lines. Exactly 9 1/2 months later, Dino was born and he nursed and he nursed. But by 18 months, not as much--he actually preferred food over the boob. And again surprise, I got my period. I mentioned to the husband it was time for his big V. He did nothing and yes, less than a month later I was staring at two lines. Nine months later, Spanky was born and I got my tubes tied. And Spanky, like his brother and sisters refused all bottles and nursed. And  nursed some more. And for his second birthday, he nursed. 

Now Spanky is two and his very favorite thing to do is nurse. Anytime. Anywhere. And it's starting to get a little annoying. I want to wean, at least drop the constant night nursing I though we had finished but no, we still are. The problem--I weaned my others by getting pregnant and my milk drying out. I will not get pregnant to wean him no matter how tempting it seems at 3 am. 

So I am wondering how did you wean your baby? Did you go cold turkey or gradual? How long was the process? I know I need to start the process now or he will need to choose a college close to home!

25 comments:

Elaine A. said...

Well, I have no advice since mine is still doing the same thing at 16 months. Although it seems to be tapering off lately...

I had no idea all your kids were so close! Wow girl, you're lucky to be sane! ; )

Jacque said...

All my kids weaned pretty easily soon after their first birthday. I took away one feeding a day until we were done. Good luck!

BTW, I was wondering about you and the hurricane? I guess you guys are okay! :)

Auds at Barking Mad said...

I am still so emotional over being forced to wean the Little Imp...we were going to let her go to three, and then GRADUALLY cut it off, but circumstances in my life dictated otherwise.

We distracted her, and the big thing, at night when she had ALWAYS gone down with about five minutes of boob was to tell her I had an errand to run and daddy would sing and rock her and then put her in bed. It worked.

She's been weaned for almost two months now. I won't lie...I miss it. She still misses it, she still asks for it.

And I still have enough milk left to support a third world country. *lol*

I guess as far as the technicalities go, don't offer it. In the morning if the first thing he does is nurse, get him some breakfast and make a big deal out of it. Distract distract distract! That's about the only concrete suggestion I have.

Does he still nurse down for naps? That's where I am going to be no use because, on the days Imp is home with me and not at Montessori, she won't take a nap. Utterly refuses. She was so used to nursing down that I can't get her to lay down and nap for anything.

Good luck sweetie! If you need anything, email me!

The White House said...

That is so my story! Only my four pregnancies and nursing have only been spread over 4 1/2 years. Even though I have only had my period once in 4 years, I guess I was ovulating even when I was nursing b/c I got knocked up, thrice.

I think Auds is right about the substituting meals/snacks for nursing and make a real big deal about it.

As far as the night nursing... I don't know b/c I was a mean "cry it out mom" and had my babes cry at night feedings for a few nights until they slept through the night (around 5 months). All of my kids dropped the night nursing and slept through the night within three or four nights. Would be much more difficult to wean a toddler than a baby.

Check with your ob and see if there is a way to deplete your milk supply via diet or supplements.

ria said...
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ria said...

Oh, God bless all of you! My son only nursed for maybe 2 months. He had "issues" (reflux and such).

I felt guilty, yes, because nursing is way more healthy. But secretly I was SO glad. You see, I never really was fond of someone hanging onto my boob. :(

And it turns out the kid's as healthy as a horse cuz of all the vitamins I take. So... all's well that ends well, I suppose. :D

P.S. Just came for a little comfort after Saturday's game. Waaaahhhhhhhhh! :'(

ria said...
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anglophilefootballfanatic.com said...

I did the cold turkey route. And, boy howdy did my boobs hurt like hell for several weeks.

mah-meeee said...

sorry, i am afraid i can't help there. both my kids weaned as soon as they found the bottle. they prefer the instant gratification of the bottle than nursing.

good luck!

Elizabeth said...

weaning for me was a nice and slow process...I started going from 5 to 4 a day when Tulip was about 10 mos old and taking one nursing down about 1x a month or so.

for extended nursing here is what I've heard to try...

First only allow nursing at certain places...maybe just at home.

Once that is the "rule" then only at certain times...first thing in the morning and just before bedtime.

Then restrict it to 1...and so forth.

sounds easier than it is...i know...but i just heard a thing on it over the weekend about weaning and thought it made a lot of sense.

i've also heard about putting lemon juice on your nipps and sometimes that will cut the habit immediately. some people find this mean...but it's really up to the parent. i don't think it's mean as long as it's at an appropriate age and maybe other things have been tried?????

you're such a good mom...and I really mean that!

Brian and Staci said...

Sorry...no good advice from me...my boys were bottle boys...but, maybe you could just go away for the weekend and relax...and then, when you came home, maybe he will have forgotten??? :( Yea, probably wouldn't be THAT easy, huh? Good luck to ya...sorry about your Buckeyes and Browns.

Amanda said...

First of all, i know were you are coming from! I spent my 20's having 4 children!
I never breastfed any of my boys though so no advice to give. I do hope you find a solution that suits the both of you! Especially at 3 am!
love,
Amanda x

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Girlfriend, don't know how much help I'll be. I weaned mine when they got their teeth at around 9 months. Not by my choice but because they were biting my nipples (their gums were sore) so I offered a bottle to give the girls a rest. I just decided, now's the time for the milk shop to close.

But, for the night feedings, I HAVE done the following:
Get a digital clock. When you go in to do the night feeding, nurse as long as he wants and watch the clock. Let's say it takes 12 minutes. The next few nights, continue at 12 minutes. Then for a few nights bump it down to 11 minutes. THen for a few nights bump it down to 10, etc. and keep going until you are down to like 2 or 3 minutes. The kid will cry when you leave, especially if he's not full, but it won't last too long. It worked for me! This technique is found in the Ferber book - How to Solve your Child's Sleep Problems.

4funboys said...

ha...I had 4 boys in 4 years... and I really did get prego within 14 months; so the weaning came naturally.

UNTIL the last baby...

and honest to goodness...
when he was a little over a year old- I left him with my sister, while T and I went to Hawaii for the week.

She's the best sister ever!!!

and when I came back... She almost disowned me because I couldn't help but nurse him "just a few times" to make MYSELF feel better.

By then, he wasn't too interested... and the rest is history!

ps... It was the only time "I actually filled out" my swimsuit on top too. but that's another story.

anti-supermom said...

I'm tired just reading this post.

I've only had my period 8 times in five years, so I feel ya!

I really don't have any wisdom, my babes just gave up on nursing and I was fine with that :)

GOOD LUCK

CC said...

No advice. Never nursed. So I've always been extremely bitter that I've had a period every frickin month since I was 13. But now after reading about 12 years of nursing, I'm not feeling quite as bitter. At least I only have to deal with it one week of each month...

KC said...

PG was my choice way to wean also LOL.. that was until Little Man.. but I didn't get him weaned till he was a little older then 3 years old.. and that was just like at the start of summer.
I tried the only letting him nurse at home bit and that was fine but he was nurseing everytime he got board when we were home, Then I tried to keep him as busy as I could so he wouldn't get board and want to nurse.
Then he was still nurseing and asking to nurse alot.. so I made it we could only nurse in bed. He hated to lay down in the daytime and hated naps.. so I thought that might make him think twice about it.. I'm a let them wean on there own sort of chick.. so going cold turkey was not an opption for me. Then his 3rd birthday rolled around and he was still nurseing.. so I thought i better do something. and started to think what worked in the past and it was the change of the taste of the milk while I was PG. So I thought of ways I could change the take to make it something he wouldn't want.. I tried tabasco on my nipples.. UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM OUCH!!!!! Don't do that.. LOL.. I was in the bathroom washing that off way before he could latch on.. HOT HOT HOT.. I was hurting so much after that I grabed the Lansinoh lanolin to put all over my sore nipples from my own stupid move.. the Lansinoh hadn't been out of the cabnet since he was a month old so it was not a taste he was use to.. but I burned my nipple and there was no way he was latching on without me havign protection.. what i found was he hated the taste of the Lansinoh and kept pulling off and saying "yuck boo" "boo yuck" so I had my nasty taste for him..so for the next few weeks I just lotioned up everytime he tried to nurse.. I would have to try to sneak it on or he would have a melt down if he saw me putting it on..
I never once told him he couldn't nurse or that he had to give it up.. but I carried the stuff around with me and any time he asked or climbed into my lap I would sneek some on and he would try to drink go a bit and then give up.. till about 3 weeks after doing that and he just stopped asking altogether.. Last month after 3 months of not nurseing he was laying next to me and asked if he could have "aboo" I told him boos are for babies and he is a big boy, he looked sort of sad, so I then said.. Plus mommies boos are broken, they don't work anymore.. He said broken.. I said yes no more milk comes out of them.. He put his head down and let out a big ~sigh~ I almost wished i could nurse him at that moment LOL.. then my 6 year old came in the room and he jumped up and proudly announced to her.. "mommy's boos broken" LOL..

Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

I weaned Savannah very gradually around 14 mos. I wanted to go longer, but I was having an upcoming surgery and I couldn't take the meds and still nurse. Do you think it would work if you just cut it down, one feeding at a time? Or is he pretty insistent?

Mamasphere said...

My daughter self weaned at 4 months WAY before I was ready. But I had to go back to work and she preferred the bottle. I was planning to nurse for years!

Sounds like you've gotten some pretty good advice. I think each person picked a method and stuck with it, and over time they all worked.

What do you think you're going to try?

HappyHourSue said...

It's been so long I don't remember! But i LOVED the post title. (actually when that song came out was the last time I nursed).

OHmommy said...

Easy.

You get pregnant again. Nursing babes hate the change of taste in milk from a prego momma.

Glad I could help. ;) LOL!!!!!

EatPlayLove said...

Well, I was nursing my youngest at 20 months about 4 times a day. I would cut out a feeding about every 2 weeks to 10 days. Finally we were down to just am when she woke up..

then I got engorged! enter cabbage leaves.

After 6 days of being super full (no nursing at all), I allowed her to nurse one more time (Although she did me the favor) and my milk production subsided.

Now I have the incredible shrinking breasts. I seriously just put on a baggy bra on Monday. Sigh. Be PREPARED.

The Nice One said...

I was one of those that nursed for a long time. It was recommended by our doctor, due to my daughter's extreme food allergies and lack of desire to eat. Redirecting was a HUGE HUGE thing. And the last session to go was that bedtime one.

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

Thank you all for advice.
Also just noticed a typo--it is almost 11 years, not twelve ;)

just jamie said...

Being that nursing twins just about sent me over the edge, I had no choice but to wean. But you, my friend, and your poor boobies must be tired.

We had a party when we threw away the "ba-ba's" And we got it on video, and we cheered, and blah, blah, blah. Could you have a "boobie-go-bye-bye" party? Invite the neighbors. Bet they've never received THAT kind of invitation before. ;)